An open mind about being gay doesn't mean a blank slate
"Maybe I'm just lucky that I have a friend that is understanding
enough to know where I'm coming from," Hatlevig, 31, said.
"My belief is just as much a part of me that I would say his
sexuality is a part of him .... I view it as something that we disagree
on, not that I'm shunning him, because if he's just doing the same
thing to me then it's a mutual shunning."
Hatlevig was also worried about how Christians would respond to
Haggard.
In case you didn't hear, last week Haggard found himself alive
in one of those old Bible stories. That is, a homosexual prostitute,
who some might call the least among us, revealed that Haggard, then
the president of the National Association of Evangelicals, was not
preaching what he was practicing.
In a letter to his church in Colorado, Haggard wrote this: "There
is a part of my life that is so repulsive and dark that I've been
warring against it all of my adult life."
And this: "...from time to time, the dirt that I thought was
gone would resurface, and I would find myself thinking thoughts
and experiencing desires that were contrary to everything I believe
and teach."
And this: "The public person I was wasn't a lie; it was just
incomplete."
The final statement, and possibly the other two, could be said
by anyone.
Haggard, a married man who spoke strongly in favor of amendments
like the one passed in Wisconsin, now finds himself on both sides
of this great debate on homosexuality, which brings me to my second
point.
It is not good to condemn people.
I've heard many people say "love the sinner, hate the sin"
when speaking about homosexuality, but I do not believe that is
possible on this issue. If you say that, you cannot hear what someone
who says "I am homosexual" is saying.
I've seen others laugh and speak with venom toward those who supported
the marriage amendment. I think they also have trouble hearing the
struggle.
Hatlevig is different. She has the ability to hold tension inside
of her.
She disagrees with homosexuality. She has a close friend who is
a homosexual, born again Christian. From this context, she asks
meaningful questions, like how Haggard might emerge from his story.
"However he ends up, there's a lot of Christians like my friend
that are struggling with the issue of, 'I'm homosexual, but I'm
born again. How does that work?' "
One final point: My homeless friend knocked on a church door last
Sunday and nobody answered. While this down-and-out individual was
looking for a warm place to rest, a lot of us were worrying about
the amendment referendum.
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